Date Night
by kingxana0
Summary: Jaune realizes that despite asking out many a girl he had no real experience with dating, so he asks the one person he is sure has that experience, Yang. Oh how he will come to regret that decision.


The day had started normally enough for Yang, sitting inside and reading up for a 'surprise' test she had managed to get Port to spill the needed chapters for. Many people probably believed that the blonde bruiser had no care for grades, but in truth she was probably one of the top scoring students in Beacon in terms of tests. How much of that was her skill and how much of it came from the fact that she constantly read Weiss and Blake's notes was unknown.

A knock on the door interrupted Yang's reading, and the young woman turned her head. "It's unlocked, come in!"

The door opened and Jaune entered, looking around for a moment before turning toward Yang. "Where is the rest of the team?" he asked.

Yang shrugged, putting her book down and stretching herself out. "Don't know, probably busy with other stuff, did you want me to leave a message for Ruby or something?" more likely it probably had to do with whatever Jaune's latest scheme to capture Weiss's heart was, but she wanted to give the guy the benefit of the doubt.

"Uh no actually, I wanted to talk to you, guess I got lucky huh?" Jaune laughed awkwardly and scratched the back of his head, more than a bit of nervousness in his voice.

That got a raised eyebrow out of the blonde brawler. "Is this about my secret hot guy harem?" she turned her head, spying Zwei sitting on Ruby's bunk and looking at her. "Which is totally not a thing I have." She said a bit louder than necessary.

"What?" Jaune asked, more confused than anything else.

Yang looked around the room before putting a hand next to her mouth to muffle the sound. "I am at least eighty percent sure that my Dad put a secret tape recorder on Zwei."

Jaune blinked and looked over at the dog, which simply rolled onto its back and stuck its tongue out happily. "Right… uh…anyway no it wasn't about any secret harems…"

"Which I don't have." Yang said, casting another distrusting glance toward Zwei.

"…yeah…" Jaune said in a voice that held more than a bit of hesitation to it now.

Yang rolled her eyes and sat up on the bed. "So what can I do you for?"

"Well, you know how I kind of end up asking a lot of girls out right?"

Yang smirked. "Oh yeah a real ladies man, pretty sure you have been striking up all zeroes recently huh stud?"

Jaune laughed a bit, unable to deny what the Huntress was saying. "Yeah, but I kind of realized that even if a girl did say yes I don't really have any experience taking girls on dates, I mean I know the basics because of my sisters but I don't really have any practice you know?"

"Sure." Yang responded, wondering where this minirant was going.

"And I figured you would probably know a lot about dates since you are…well I mean." He waved his hands in her general direction.

"Smoking hot and the bane of restful dreams?" Yang added in with a coy smirk, knowing that she could cause the easily flustered boy to blush.

"Right, yeah, that," her assumption was proven correct as the blonde boy's entire face became a uniform shade of scarlet. "So I figured that uh… would you go on a mock date with me so I could figure out what I need to do in case I ever get to go on a real one?" Jaune asked, words spilling out of his mouth quickly.

His request took Yang completely by surprise. It wasn't the first time someone had asked her on a date, but it was the first time someone asked her to do something like this. For a moment she pondered the request. It wouldn't be a real date, just helping a friend out, and if the situations were reversed she knew that Jaune would probably help her. She shrugged and put on her usual cocky smirk. "Well fine, if you so desperately need my help then I can't just say no can I?"

Jaune smiled brightly and nodded. "Oh man that's so awesome, how about tomorrow night, I will get all the stuff ready for it" he turned around and went to the door, only for the rest of team RWBY to walk in. "Ladies." Jaune said with a silly grin and a bow of his head before walking out of the room.

Ruby tilted her head as the boy left. "He seemed pretty chipper; did he get good news or something?"

Yang laughed a bit and picked up her school book. "Even better, he just got a date with the hottest girl in school."

Blake rolled her eyes, already annoyed at the way this conversation was going. She carefully avoided Zwei's line of sight and sat back on her bed, content with just pretending that she wasn't here.

Ruby put a hand to her chin and smiled. "So Jaune finally asked Pyrrha out, or was it the other way around?"

Yang glared at her little sister. "No he didn't ask out Pyrrha."

Ruby blinked in confusion. "Oh, uh Blake I didn't…"

"No," Blake said, picking up her book. "Just…no."

"I thought Nora and Ren were a thing through." Ruby said, grasping at straws at this point.

"Hey why am I not on this list?" Weiss asked, annoyed at her removal from the list of hottest girls in Beacon. Besides Jaune always asked her out, why wouldn't she be at the top of guesses?

"Well I mean Yang said hottest in all of Beacon," Ruby noticed the hellfire in Weiss's eyes and decided to go for a different approach. "And you always shoot him down so I figured there wasn't too great of a chance for that to happen."

Weiss seemed to accept this with a nod.

Yang grunted and looked at them. "He asked me out, jeesh didn't think I had to spell it out." Through she wouldn't admit it she took was annoyed at somehow not making it on the list above everyone else.

Ruby's smile disappeared, replaced by a look of abject terror. "He, you, what?"

"Come on Ruby, it's just a date." Yang was a bit surprised at her reaction, she expected a bit of shock or playful teasing, but the look of fear on her sister's face was plain to see.

"Yang do you not…remember how your dates usually end?" Ruby asked, blinking at her sister in confusion.

"What you talking about Ruby?" Yang asked, unsure of what she was talking about.

"You…wow you really don't remember," Ruby walked over and jumped onto the top bunk, petting Zwei for a minute. "Do you remember your first date?"

Yang shrugged. "Vaguely?"

Ruby took a deep breath and sighed. "You were fifteen, went out with some dude from your class. You ended up breaking both of his legs and starting a fire that burned the entire gym."

Yang's eyebrows shot up. "Wait a minute, that sounds like something I would remember."

Weiss pulled out her Scroll and typed a search. "Here it is 'fire destroys gym, started during a dance by a girl whose date stepped on her foot'."

"That…that could have been anyone." Yang replied, not wanting to believe the truth.

"Or your second date, where the guy ended up in a full body cast when he took you out to dinner," Ruby looked down at Zwei. "Oh, and the restaurant got set on fire."

"That seems to be a running theme." Blake said, turning the page on a book she wasn't really reading.

"Listen I don't…" Yang's eyes suddenly widened as memory after memory that had been deeply suppressed up to that point came flooding back. "Oh…" she said in a small voice.

Weiss continued scrolling through the various pages. "It's actually kind of impressive how much pure chaos you can cause in a single evening."

"That's not something to be proud of through!" Yang said, putting her head down in her hands. "Oh crap, what happens if I kill Jaune, I am pretty sure that Pyrrha will kill me?"

Ruby hoped over to her sister, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Hey, don't worry; at most he will end up in a body cast for a few weeks."

Yang glared at Ruby.

"Okay what if we went on the date and made sure that the two of you don't end up burning anything down?" Ruby suggested looking to her other team members. "It can be like a group exercise in strategy and stealth."

Weiss and Blake gave each other a small look. They both knew that this would no doubt end badly, but neither could resist the idea of being there to see whatever was going to happen.

"We're in." both of them said.

"Right!" Ruby jumped down, Zwei still in her arms. "Operation Make Sure Jaune Doesn't Die starts now!"

* * *

><p>Yep another comedy and slightly crack fic. How will the date go? Will Jaune get his spine broken? How will anyone possibly survive the next night? Find out in the next chapter.<p>

Drop a review if you find it funny and can't wait for more. Catch you guys later.


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